Old West Tales - Excuse me, you're eating my foot.

For an intoduction to Old West Tales, click here: Old West Tales - Introduction

Who else lived in Old West that you haven't told us about?

First the humans: Jamie lived in our suite. Jamie was a Clef-Hanger (all male UNC singing group) who played guitar. Because he was a poser, and not a real rocker, Vic changed Jamie's name to Hie-may and always called him Hie-may, even to his face.

There were a couple of other guys in the suite with a dart board. One time we were throwing darts from out the door and someone hit a can of deoderant. Deoderant started shooting out of the side of the can, which began spinning around and filling the room with a white mist, gagging all within.

Directly below our room were 3 frat boys, and boy were they A-holes. We would get drunk and see how loud we could be by jumping off the top bunk onto the floor. Despite my greater weight, Vic usually won because he had more hatred and the advantage of cowboy boots.

Also, at the bottom of our stairwell lived Dan, the RA. Dan was not at all cool and took his job and authority way too seriously. Vic was convinced that student housing had purposefully placed us under Dan's watchfull eye.

There were others in the dorm, like the hippie guy with the Black Sabbath Bootleg who I got photographed with for the Daily Tar Heel while Hacky-sacking one afternoon, but they aren't really important.

Non-humans: Brian was gone, but how could we make sure that we wasn't forgotten? Easy enough - Name a goldfish after him. Vic had an aquarium in our Old West room. The only thing in the aquarium was Luther, Vic's newt. Luther was very special to Vic and they had been through a lot together. Our freshman year Luther had survived an incident where a pickle had been placed in his tank at a party.

I went to the pet store and bought the biggest, ugliest, speckeldy-looking fish that they had. We named him "Brian" and he went into the tank with Luther. All seemed well until we noticed that one of Luther's feet was gone and only a nub remained. We started watching the tank and noticed that Brian would take a quick nibble from Luther's foot whenever he got the chance.