We went to a birthday party this weekend with a Nazi/Magician performing. First, he had all the kids come and sit on the ground in front of him. Then, "speaking to the kids", loud enough for all to hear he said "And the parents should all gather around and sit down so that they do not talk and distract from the performance." Next he pulled a cell phone out of a hat and told everyone to turn off their cell phone or he would take it. Then the show began. At one point, an excited child was walking around and tripped over a bench and fell, harmlessly and uninjured. As the child's mother rushed to pick him up, the Nazi/Magician said, "See, that's why I told all the kids to sit down." When the show was over, all of the children rushed forward to pet the rabbit, exposing a puddle on the ground where a very embarrassed 4 year old sat. The girl's mother took her to the car and changed her. When they returned, we learned that the girl had wanted to use the bathroom but was afraid to move. All the kids got a treat bag with an autographed photo stapled to it.The photo is cheezy, but the Nazi/Magician literally scared the piss out of the kids.
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I know the Nazi Magician! Our paths crossed many years ago when I was working as Cultural Editor for a small independent newsmonthly. He contacted me about not only doing an article on him, but insisted his story would no doubt warrant a cover feature. After much diva-like attitude, he was finally able to coordinate his busy schedule with a reporter’s I had assigned to the story. They agreed to meet at the office so we were all anxious to get a look at this guy. He arrived like rock star and was a bit shocked that not everyone in the building knew who he was. He insisted that we all stop what we were doing and gather ‘round. He opened the interview with a few coin tricks, which to some hungry hippies, were mildly intriguing. Finally, the explanation of how magic saved his life. Evidently, he was robbed in his driveway at gunpoint. A shot was fired and the pellet that would have penetrated the main artery in his leg was blocked by a coin he used in his slight of hand routine. Okay, impressive enough, but he was never destined for the cover. He was outraged when enlightened to this fact and he was deeply offended. He made several phone calls and trips to the office to try and influence me to reconsider. I fully expected him to pull out one of those rotating spirals, but alas, after much artful dodging, he and his ego went home. I guess if near death can’t tame the beast, nothing can!
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