Those who know me well know that I think Bob Seger is the worst recording artist ever - based on the fact that he has so many songs that sound so different but that each suck in their own unique way.Last week, I started the Bob Seger Game - Where we name as many Bad Bob Seger songs as we can, from memory (this means no googleing). You can only name 3 songs at a time. Here are the 4 entries so far:
1. Against the Wind with the classic line,
"We were young and we were running, against the wind."
The idea of running against the wing is ridiculous. Couldn't he think of something a little more difficult, like running through sand or running up a gradual incline.
2. "She gives them quite a battle
All that they can handle
She’ll bruise some
She’ll hurt some too
But oh they love to watch her strut
Oh they do respect her but
They love to watch her strut"
3. "who wants to break the news about uncle joe
you remember uncle joe, he was the one afraid to cut the cake... "
(Fire Lake)
all-time Bob Seger crapola
4. Simile - is the comparison of two unlike things using "like" or "as".
The most idiotic simile of all time is credited to Bob Seger:
Like A Rock
So come on, who is next. I know that there are many more crappy Seger Songs.
6 comments:
Good god what's with all the spam comments! You're going to have turn on comment verification, dude. You're a lawyer, can't you do something?!?
How 'bout that old classic "Workin' on the night moose"?
And who could forget the timeless "Horizontal Bop":
Wally’s getting’ anxious thinkin’ ’bout tonight
Bruce is all spiffy lookin’ wicked lookin’ right
Eddie’s getting’ spruced
And donna’s getting’ loose
Theyre passin’ round the bottle
And they’re gettin’ good and juiced
B.g.’s winin’ dinin’ checkin’ talent at the club
Skippers hauntin’ second lookin’ forward to his rub
The busters from the country
And the hitters from the shop
Everybody wants to do the horizontal bop
Gah.
Good Work,
#5 Night Moves - with the classic line "Trying to make some front page drive-in news"
#6 Horizontal Bop (Need I say more?)
How about, #7
"I think i'm going to katmandu.
That's really, really where i'm going to.
If i ever get out of here,
That's what i'm gonna do.
K-k-k-k-k-k katmandu.
I think that's really where i'm going to.
If i ever get out of here,
I'm going to katmandu.
Can you jsut picture Seger in monk's robes and shaved head, the great seeker after wisdom, making his pilgrimage to ancient Katmandu? Me neither.
If anyone is reading this, you had better go ahead and think of a Bob Seger song and post it, because I am going to keep bringing this game back again and again, as we have only begun to scratch the surface of Seger's crappy song library.
Q - How are you feeling today?
A (Normal Person) - I'm feeling pretty good.
A (Bob Seger) - I feel like a number.
That's right, #8
"Gonna cruise out of this city
Head down to the sea
Gonna shout out at the ocean
Hey it’s me
And I feel like a number
Feel like a number
Feel like a stranger
A stranger in this land
I feel like a number
I’m not a number
I’m not a number
Dammit I’m a man
I said I’m a man"
You guys are full of it. You've forgotten the deepest Segar song ever -- "Turn the Page"
Just listen to that liquor-ravaged voice as it belts out these lines:
"On a long and lonesome highway
East of Omaha
You can hear the engine moaning out
His one long one note song
You can think about the woman
Or the girl you knew the night before
But your thoughts will be wandering
The way they always do
When you're riding sixteen hours
And there's nothing much to do
And you don't feel much like riding
You just wish the trip was through
Here I am, On the road again
There I am, Up on the stage
Here I go, Playing star again
There I go, Turn the page"
Feel the ANGST:
"Well you walk into a restaurant
Strung out from the road
And you feel the eyes upon you
As you're shaking off the cold
You pretend it doesn't bother you
But you just want to explode
Most times you can't hear them talk
Other times you can
All the same old cliche's
Is that a woman or a man
And you always seem outnumbered
You don't dare make a stand
Here I am, On the road again
There I am...", etc., etc.
I think I've made my point. So why don't you put that in your collective pipes and smoke it!
Excellent, #9 = Turn The Page
This song shows us the true Seger. Seger thinks touring and being a musician sux, I think his music sux.
What about a Seger song that proves its own premise?
(1984)Q - Say Bob, if you like that Old Time Rock n' Roll so much, then why does your music suck so bad?
A - Call me a relic, call me what you will
Say I’m old-fashioned, say I’m over the hill
Today’ music ain’t got the same soul
So the very song that you are now singing, today, sux and the song itself tells us that it sux.
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